Blogger · Changes · goals · Parenting · reflection · Uncategorized · working life

Why do I feel like I’m the only one standing still?

So today I feel flat, not upset, not emotional, not stressed just flat. I’m not sure if it’s my brother moving to Japan for a year, I had a small cry yesterday morning when I wrote him a little goodbye post, a long term colleague leaving announcing he’s leaving, Me turning down an offer of what would have meant I was working full time hours every week because I felt I couldn’t make the commitment to my family I want to be able to or just because everyone else seems to be moving forwards while I’m stood still. 
There is a limit to what I can do with my employment if I still want to be there for the sports days, special assemblies, teaching training days and ballet lessons. There are only so many hours im available to work if I don’t want T in after school club every day and want her to continue her out of school hobbies.

Motherhood is the most wonderful thing I’ve ever done but I feel like to do it properly I have to sacrifice all lifestyle/career changes until T reaches high school. No I don’t particularly want to move to Japan but I would like to be able to say yes I’m making a change. Wouldn’t it be great to say yes I’m moving on to new and exciting chapters in my life? I’m starting a job I really want to do, a new challenge not to mention financially contributing more to my family than I currently do. Yet when an opportunity presents itself I feel like I can’t say yes because my family has to come first and working full time hours would mean sacrifices I don’t want to make.

It would be so nice to feel like I was making progression in my life, that I had a goal I could work towards achieving, besides motherhood instead of feeling like the world is changing around me while I stand still.

Advertisements
Adult braces · Changes · Dentist · goals · Orthodontist · Uncategorized

Adult Braces- 8 months in

So today I had my 6 week tightening and at first it all seemed like it was going fairly straightforward but then my lovely orthodontist started taking an awfully long time to look at my top teeth. She was swivelling her chair from behind me to the front and back, moving my lips up and down, getting me to bite and open again and again. 

She eventually decided to add a chain link across my gap on the right side to pull my tooth across into the space. She told me I might see a small gap appear from where the tooth moves from but not to worry as she will sort it.

She was pleased with how much my bottom teeth had moved forward but still can’t include my last bottom one that isn’t in the wire,  fingers crossed for next time!

Also next time she is going to take off a couple of brackets and move them to a slightly different position as she wants to pull the teeth straighter. I’m a little nervous about this as I’ve not had a bracket off yet, I’m hoping they will just use the same light they used when they put them on and they will pop right off! The only thing is if she has to move a bracket she will have to put a soft wire in for a month as new brackets won’t be strong enough to hold a stiff one. This basically means my treatment is on hold for a month until the brackets are ready to start getting pulled all over the place again. It’s a bit of a frustration but if that’s what it takes to get my teeth as straight as possible I know my ortho will know what is best.

So after a slightly longer appointment than normal there should be some more movement by the next time and more chain links to come over my other gaps so they will start to disappear too. It’s a slow process but the small differences I see each time is what keeps me motivated.

Changes · Children · Easter · exercise · Healthy eating · Parenting · Uncategorized

Healthy parenting vs convenience 

Parenting is a minefield this we know and one part of that minefield is parenting healthily. From the moment we have a baby we are given advice like breast is best, only use homemade baby food, water over juice and so it goes on. As your child gets older this advice gets less and less and you are left to make your own decisions and parent your child in the way you see fit. Yes this is good, we have this little person that we can shape into whatever we choose diet wise. They can be vegetarian, vegan, drink only soya milk or live off of McDonald’s!

T has always had a balanced diet, she loves all vegetables and fruit, has never been a fussy eater and is usually willing to try new foods. But as your child gets older and becomes easier to parent on the go, grabbing a quick snack on the way to ballet becomes the norm rather than preparing a fully homemade blended fruit puree decanted lovingly into a sterilised Tupperware!

Sunday’s are now no longer for batch cooking the weeks meals and freezing individually into carefully measured portions but instead for completing homework, attending play dates, ironing school clothes and searching for PE kits.
The days of searching for organic, unprocessed, appealing snacks for your little one are now replaced with handing out the closest item to hand from the snack cupboard.
Gone is the separate meal time for your little one including a separate menu using carefully selected seasonal vegetables to broaden your child’s tastes as they grow. Now they eat what you eat at the time you eat it, and frozen vegetables occasionally is no longer a cardinal sin.

Does all this mean I am a bad parent? No, it simply means I am human. T has become easier to parent as she has grown but in this time her needs have also understandably changed. This means my time is spread between hobbies, school work, play dates and family time rather than fully focusing on prepping and planning her weeks food while watching her play on the carpet.

Yes she still has balanced meals and she likes to count her fruit and vegetables at the end of every day to see who has had the most, often if she hasn’t she will ask for more, but certain areas of her diet have become convenient. We have noticed this and a couple of weeks back we decided to make a conscious effort to try and change things.

A few things we have decided to change are;

Cereal- we are no longer buying T anything with chocolate in because she loves it or deserves a treat. She loves healthy cereal and hasn’t complained once since we switched so this is something we can easily stick to. This week we have been adding fruit to porridge and Weetabix to make it even more fun.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Yoghurt- kids yoghurt is so convenient, you just pick it up and pop it in the lunch box, or hand it out after lunch or dinner. They are also full full full of sugars and colours. We have gone back to basics with natural yoghurt, a drizzle of honey and fruit. I’ve also bought lots of smaller tupperware pots so I can send these in lunches and make them for us adults too!

 

 

 

20170416_082626.jpg

 

Snacks- gone are the Barney Bear cake bars, The individually wrapped, brightly coloured packets of sugary treats will no longer appear in this house on such a regular basis. I was actually surprised how little searching it took to find healthier snacks while shopping in the supermarket and T has enjoyed granola bites instead of biscuits and rice cakes instead of crisps. The good weather has also meant our meals have all been sprinkled with salad and T has enjoyed adding herbs from the garden. Our Easter week has also been the most active it could be with T taking her bike out 4 times and scooter twice and playing outside nearly every day.

Our decision to change our own eating habits as well as T’s hasn’t come at the easiest time with our house now being full of Easter eggs but the initial excitement wears off we intend to go back to chocolate days twice a week, usually a Tuesday and Saturday, this is something we have done for a long time and T looks forward to.

Once school is back and the work routine begins again I’m hoping we will be set to continue with our healthy choices, fitting in fun exercise where we can. I’m not saying there won’t ever be a time where I will say no to throwing a fruit shoot in the back of the car or that a packet of crisps won’t ever darken our cupboard doors again but hopefully this will just be something we see as more of a treat not a staple part of our diets so it will be better for all of us. Overall I will feel I am doing the best I can for T and not relying on convenience when I could make healthy, easy and fun swaps in all our diets. I’ve seen that kids can find just having a change fun so why not change from convenient to healthy and nutritious and get the kids in involved in making and preparing their own food choices when you can too.

Making easy healthy food fun and exciting while enjoying the changes yourself = mum winning!

Blogger · Changes · Family · friends · Friendship · Uncategorized

Friendships

I’ve been thinking about writing a blog about friendships for a little while and how we all change over time as we grow and evolve into different people. Some people don’t change, some stay the same as they always were. Others find they place in life, their happy and change to fit their lives around that. Because of this some friendships are built to last and some are not. Some people change with you, some do not. Then you meet new people with the same thoughts and values as you and start to realise the world is a big place and there could be more people out there like you its just a case of meeting them and starting a friendship. The ones that stick around, that accept your changes and are happy for you they are few and far between but that’s ok because life is full of people we meet and are in our lives for a purpose at that particular time. Some of these people end up in our lives for longer than others, some we become close to but then eventually drift away from. Some there are just too many differences to be close for ever. Some no matter how hard you try seem to want to close the door and say goodbye. Others the time comes when closing the door is the only option as the differences are too great.
All this is only important in a small proportion of our lives because the most important thing is family. When I had my daughter my world immediately revolved around her, then when I separated from her father my friends helped me get through tough times and my world still revolved around her. Now I have found my husband I have someone who wants to share her childhood with me and it’s amazing. If we are lucky in life we find friends who want to share this journey with us but building lasting friendships is just like building a lasting relationship, it takes work,  commitment, give and take, on both sides and most of all effort. Once the cracks start to show sometimes this is the beginning of the end, sometimes not.
The main thing is we surround ourselves with people we can be honest and open around and who make us laugh. Life is too short and full of too much stress to let anyone or anything else unnecessarily bring you down.
Be happy, if you can’t it’s time for a change.